"1985, from the womb I came out, ON MAH BIRTHDAY, the doctor said, 'Whatcha cryin' about?' AND I SAAAID, 'Is that a rhetorical question?' Know why I cried? 'I have a serious lack of hair on the side, of my head!' Little baby people don't have sideburns. They gotta grow them when they're older. But if your little baby already has sideburns, that awesome, don't be concerned! Don't be concerned about the little bitty baby wit da big big sideburns! You should not be concerned-acerned about the little itty bitty baby with the big big sideburns!"